BTC Downturn, ETH Scaling, Coinbase Listing and 20 Crypto Jokes

Welcome! Let’s do a short recap of what happened in the crypto week behind us. Coin Metrics said there’s little reason to believe that Bitcoin miners are responsible for downturns in BTC’s price, Kraken’s CEO Jesse Powell said that “extreme” ethereum selling caused Monday’s flash crash to USD 700, and almost USD 4bn in trading positions was liquidated in 24 hours, followed by another USD 1bn liquidated in one hour as a selloff in the crypto market intensified. Meanwhile, analysts said the vast majority of Ethereum miners are unlikely to protest EIP-1559, while it was said that Ethereum scaling is coming in March. Bitfinex and Tether reached a settlement of legal proceedings with the New York AOG , South Korean Gyeonggi Province announced an “intense” crackdown on crypto-flavored MLMs. Meanwhile, Craig Wright sent his lawyers against Bitcoin devs, and bitcoiners decided to strike back.

Furthermore, the central Bank of Japan is set to launch a pilot for a digital yen this spring, Coinbase aims for USD 1bn direct listing, Bill Gates distanced himself from bitcoin buying, but talked up a digital money or payments infrastructure, “more than 1 million customers” bought bitcoin “for the first time” on Cash App in January, and while Crypto.com is experiencing “accelerated growth,” expecting to reach the 100 million user mark by 2023, CRO doubled as Crypto.com said it will burn CRO 70bn in preparation for the CRO Chain Mainnet launch on March 25. Meanwhile, MoneyGram claimed its support for Ripple was still in place. We reported on the ways governments could attack Bitcoin and its owners, defeated Donald Trump-themed NFT sold for USD 6.6m, Japanese consumer watchdog warned people about sophisticated crypto scams that pry on love-hungry users via dating apps, and Chinese police warned about rising digital yuan-themed scams.

And now, your jokes. Enjoy!
__________

Heey, CT! How’s everything going?

__

Ethereum contemporary history for beginners.

__

Ethereum getting scaled.

__

Ethenet Rysen.

__

Very detailed.

I put together a comprehensive guide on when to buy from r/Bitcoin

__

Here you go, nocoiners and conspiracy theorists.

__

So much liquidation going around, something’s bound to snap.

__

Totally!

__

“I see fake tether.”

__

Get that dip!

Don’t panic sell! The institutions want your bitcoin at a discount, stop giving it to them! from r/Bitcoin

__

OK, googling… Donors get like USD 1K-5K for their kidney on the black market though.

__

According to alleged analysts:

__

Schiffting.

Peter Schiff was in the local Springfield Newspaper from r/Bitcoin

__

Harder head required.

__

Hey, look, it’s a bear.

__

Look at that doge go!

__

Here’s your crypto historical documentary.

__

A political thriller.

__

And some crypto action.

__

Till next week!